DOROTHY TENNOV LOVE AND LIMERENCE PDF

She interviewed people in the throes of an obsessive love, sometimes on an unhealthy level. Limerence includes a sense of being emotionally dependent on the object of your affections, devastation if these feelings are not reciprocated, and fantasies about the other person which can border on extreme and elaborate. A person in the state of limerence exaggerates the positive attributes of the object of his or her affection and downplays their flaws. A limerent person can suffer from such a hyperfocus on the other person that they begin to lose focus on their lives and revolve their entire day around interaction with this person. Not like I faint every time we touch. Not like everything I do depends on you.

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She interviewed people in the throes of an obsessive love, sometimes on an unhealthy level. Limerence includes a sense of being emotionally dependent on the object of your affections, devastation if these feelings are not reciprocated, and fantasies about the other person which can border on extreme and elaborate. A person in the state of limerence exaggerates the positive attributes of the object of his or her affection and downplays their flaws.

A limerent person can suffer from such a hyperfocus on the other person that they begin to lose focus on their lives and revolve their entire day around interaction with this person.

Not like I faint every time we touch. Not like everything I do depends on you. This is rooted in the biochemical nature of love , which is very much like a drug addiction. Helen Fisher discovered that the brains of people in love resemble the brains of cocaine addicts. Though the relationship between you two is nonexistent, shallow or just in its early stages, you find yourself fantasizing constantly about what your future together would look like.

You find yourself lost in elaborate fantasies about his person, from the typical to the eccentric. You experience physical symptoms when around them or interacting with them in any way. Whether that means hanging around their general neighborhood or their favorite coffee shop, you plan your day around how you can spend time with them. You idealize them and put them on a pedestal. Everything they do, from the awkward to the charming, gets flagged in your mind as evidence that they are a flawless, loveable human being.

Your whole day tends to revolve around them and interactions with them. You feel a special and powerful connection to them, almost like a magnetic pull. You believe they are your soulmate, even if you barely know each other. Jealousy can occur even if the relationship is nonexistent.

When the person withdraws from you, you sink into a deep depression and experience an overall sense of hopelessness. You look very deeply into their words and actions, reliving each moment to find clues that this person feels the same way about you.

You experience an unbearable and overwhelming longing for their affection, attention and approval. How Long Does Limerence Last? Tennov estimated that limerence could last anywhere from a few weeks to a few years depending on whether or not feelings are reciprocated. Unlike love in a long-term relationship, limerence can be short-lived and fleeting, as well as one-sided.

It can be based on only a few interactions or stem from a relationship. It can happen in the first few months of a new relationship, after a break-up or prior to a commitment. Those in limerence may actually have their feelings strengthened, not hindered, by the withdrawal of the person on the receiving end of their affections.

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Dorothy Tennov

Question of limerence or question of obsession? Limerence can only represent a phase of physical and mental agitation that is mainly caused by our love towards a person. To a certain extent, the symptoms of this issue do not deviate from the norm concerning natural infatuation. Excessive sweating, heart palpitations, confusion, sensation of lightness, and agitated hormones are the keys of this phase that is mainly marked by romantic love.

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Love and limerence (part one)

My journey of exploration occurred in three identifiable Author Dorothy Tennov, Ph. My journey of exploration occurred in three identifiable phases. During the first phase, the Phase of Wandering and Wondering Through Questionnaires and Testimonials, I was primarily involved in other topics, but the "love cards" assessments, in which students anonymously selected statements that applied to them and rejected those that did not, and the paper and pencil surveys submitted to groups continued to supply evidence of the importance of the topic, and of its prevalence, but I had not advanced beyond Shakespeare in understanding. Toward the end of that first phase, my emphasis had begun to shift from answers to questions posed by an investigator to the collection of personal testimonies, those of volunteers as well as those of published autobiographers, novelists, and historians. Transition to the second phase, the Phase of Limerence, was abrupt. It happened in the fall of Earlier that year I had presented the first formal paper on the subject at the meetings of the American Psychological Association.

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