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I sported braces, freckles, and octagonal glasses. Then Atlanta burned and she survived the Civil War and made a fetching green dress from her living room drapes. There Scarlett stood, hooped-out and surrounded by a huge flock of men. And as she basked in the center of all that fabulous male attention, she looked just like the cat that ate the canary! It would take some years before I would fully understand her man- catching secret.

By not focusing exclusively on any one suitor, she lured an entire flock of Lovebirds, and wisely kept her options open. Scarlett was flirtatiously multitasking!

She had every boy at Twelve Oaks eating out of the palm of her hand. Several years later, braces off and contacts in, I donned a halter- top and a little too much Bonne Bell blush and went to my first high school party. I intuitively practiced what Scarlett had taught me and allowed a flock of boys to gather around without making the silly mistake of getting romantic tunnel vision.

This would land me a date with Paul, the star quarterback, his scent an intoxicating blend of Ivory soap and cigarettes. And also Ross, a towheaded junior who walked me home the next day after soccer practice. His dazzling white teeth would leave a small hickey that my mother would notice and ground me for later that weekend. My romantic career had officially begun! This misstep can happen during any phase of dating, and is a genetic holdover from the millions of years that women spent picking berries on the tundra.

Warning: The problem is that most men like to date women exactly the other way around. On the contrary, most men subscribe to the Male String Theory of Dating. Boys were learning much more than teamwork in Little League. They also learned the value of rotating the talent. The Male String Theory of Dating A single male has his starting lineup of MVPs, then his Second String Girls, who like him just a little more than he likes them, and finally his Romantic Replacements, who are kept in a holding pattern on the bench.


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